Things We Say:
(917): you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Me: you know you are in a long distance relationship when you start investing in them.
If I could take two words out of the male vocabulary it'd be titties and hun--Regina.
My friend called me a Hausfrau and I told him I don't clean.--me to Boyfriend
A Putzfrau is a cleaning lady--michelle
Careful! You squeeze the head too much and you are gonna make it squirt!--my father talking about a water bottle.
Blurb My Brain:
So I don't know what you all did today, but I bet you I did less. Yes. Less. I think the only thing I did today worth mentioning was that I made a sammich. Well. Three sammiches. And I talked to Boyfriend. Other than that, I updated and virus scanned my laptop.
You know, normally people wouldn't say that doing less is an accomplishment. I think it is a success. I mean how awesome is it that I got to spend the last day of smelling Grease Free by developing lazy stomach marks? For those of you wondering, LSM come from when you sit improperly in a chair or on a couch or lay in bed, and your poor posture forms a crease. Come on. I am not saying I am fat. Because I am not. But I am saying that I have poor posture when I am decidedly being lazy.
Speaking of being lazy, I start work tomorrow night. Oh yeah, 5-9 training, here I come. :)
You know what else I don't understand? Trolls. That's all. I will not get into it. Sorry.
Oh! Also: I have a new business partner. Her name is Sarah. I have employed her as my text-receiver. This literally means nothing to you guys. Except that Things We Say will now be updated more easily. It is so much easier to send the funny quote to her and then copy and paste it later here. :) in case you are wondering here is the new blogger app.
In the future we may see more posts from Sarah. We will see. Lol.
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